Against All Odds
by LAPoch
Summary: This is a story to explore how Sara can live again in Vegas, Grissom can't, and yet they are happily married! Yep, the PTB put our heroes in situations that defy all odds, with no rhyme or reason forthcoming, so it's up to us to unravel this mystery.
1. Chapter 1

**Disclaimer: I don't own these characters, and certainly don't profit from them or their stories; but I just like to have fun with the untold stories.**

**A/N: I must confess, the past year or so I have turned my attentions to other topics, but now it seems my hand is forced. The PTB have put our heroes (Grissom and Sara, of course) in implausible situations with no explanation forthcoming. Grrr. So I must turn my attention to telling the back-story, ah-gain, trying to explain how our favorite couple got where they are from where they left off. **

Chapter One:

The night turned to day, and the grave shift CSI's were all clocked out with one exception. Supervisor Willows was going through her end of the month chores after shift. The schedule, the open cases, the evaluations; it never ended. She paused on Sara's evaluation. What a Godsend she had become. Catherine could never have envisioned Sara coming back at all, much less being such glue to a fractured team. There was never a doubt about Sara's work ethic and intelligence, but her ability to provide the much needed continuity that even Catherine couldn't find was nothing short of remarkable. Not to mention, her flight from Vegas left no hope that the brilliant CSI would ever be able to perform her job again in any capacity, surely not in Vegas, and especially not in Vegas once Grissom was gone. Catherine could only shake her head in the sheer lunacy of the paradox.

Then she turned to the schedule, _how long will Sara be here? _Sara and Grissom were an enigma, to say the very least, but how it was that a married couple, _newlyweds_ for Christ's sake, chose to live an ocean apart was beyond her, even for them. She simply shook her head and deferred the schedule making until she could corner Sara and find out her plans.

Meanwhile, the grave CSI's gathered for breakfast at Frank's, the notorious location of Nick's car theft. They still couldn't bring themselves to ever go back to the diner they last saw Warrick. Ordering was easy as they all knew the menu by heart. That gave Nick and Greg time to get some dirt out of Sara.

"So, Sar," Nick started up, "How is it you and Grissom are _newly_ married and spending so much time so very far apart?" his tone somewhat sarcastic.

"It's complicated," she replied nonchalantly, "Pass the sugar, will ya?"

Greg frowned, "So, fill us in," he shrugged innocently, "so, um, how does it all work for you guys?"

Sara now paused. She realized they were concerned and weren't about to let up until they knew the couple was OK. She gave them her trademark, sideways grin, "Guys, don't worry, everything is just fine. It's working fine." She nodded and smiled broader for emphasis.

"How can that be?" Nick lamented.

Sara inhaled deeply, "Let's just say," she paused to consider her answer, "I hope neither one of you ever experiences the pain of burnout, but if you do, then you'll have the answers to your questions about us."

Both of their faces twisted into quizzical, confused expressions just as the food was delivered. Plates were passed around, and silverware was put into action as the famished group dove into the food. Ray Langston was a passive observer of all the conversation, choosing to listen rather than to participate. He had an endless admiration of Gil Grissom, and now he had similar admiration, and even a certain fondness, for Gil's soul mate, Sara. He was fascinated with both individuals, and even more fascinated with the unconventional couple. He started in on breakfast desperately hoping that Greg and Nick would pursue the line of questions they started.

Greg finally caught his breath, "So, you're not giving us anymore than that?"

Snickering softly, "Greg, you don't need any more than that." Placing her hand on his forearm to make sure she had his full attention, "You have my word; we're in a very good place."

That gesture ended the interrogation. Neither Greg nor Nick, and definitely not Ray, could continue after she effectively commanded their trust. They had to believe her, but were still baffled by the arrangement, and couldn't put their concern completely aside. They would simply have to wait.

* * *

Greg sauntered into the break room before shift with his private stash of pure Kona coffee to put on a pot sure to get everyone off to a great start to the night. Catherine ambled in and was suddenly struck with the fortuitous circumstances. Greg was always Sara's closest friend of all the CSI's, arguably even more so than Grissom; surely he would know what was happening with the couple, _surely_.

"Hey, Greg, what ya got there?"

"Ahh, Cat," he beamed, "you are all in for a treat, the finest of the big island, a coffee that could only be found in paradise…"

She cut him off, "So what is it for goodness sake," the exasperation of overwork in her tone.

"Kona," he replied stoically.

"I'm sorry," shaking her head, "I shouldn't have cut you off, and how great of you to share that incredible coffee with us. I can't wait to sample it."

Nodding he went back to setting the coffee maker.

Looking around to make sure they were still alone, "Greg, have you talked to Sara much about her situation here?"

"I've tried," he shrugged, "she seems quite happy, which," he looked up quizzically, "I don't understand."

They both burst out in spontaneous laughter; relieved to know someone else is just as baffled as they were. Catherine was the first to speak, "I can't believe what a Godsend Sara has been for us, but," she paused, her tone now sober, "I wonder how long she can help us."

Greg nodded, "She insisted she and Grissom are in a good place, but I find that very hard to picture."

Catherine looked into his confused expression and knew she would not be getting any help from Greg. She would need to go to the source. Sara hadn't shared with Greg and that didn't bode well for her sharing with Catherine. The only thing she had going for her was a schedule that needed to be filled out. Surely Sara would at least share enough to allow her to do that.

"Hey guys," Sara's eyes lit up, "Is that Kona I smell?" Her eyes closed as she moved to the coffee maker, "Oh, my," a deep inhalation, "Greg, you spoil us." Her Sara smile was ear to ear. This was not a woman in a bad situation. As a matter of fact, this was a woman happier than her coworkers had ever seen her, adding to their confusion.

Greg and Catherine traded confused glances. "So, Sara," Catherine led in, "I need to speak with you tonight about your availability."

Still eyeing the coffee as it dripped, "I told you; I can do whatever you need."

Catherine rolled her eyes, "What I mean is," she looked skyward, "for how long?"

Sara straightened up, her face became serious, "That is a different matter altogether."

Nodding, "Yes, but I have a schedule to make out; I need to know."

Sara's gaze drifted off into space. She didn't know the answer. The _answer_ was working through his issues across the Atlantic. She inhaled sharply, "I, ah, I guess I need to fill you in on things."

Catherine's heartbeat quickened at the thought of learning what was happening with the most enigmatic, secretive, and downright baffling couple she had ever known. "I only need a date, but I would certainly welcome whatever you want to tell me about."

Sara nodded, "We'll need some time, away from here," she smiled, "a date on the calendar won't be forthcoming."

"I see." Catherine swallowed, "How 'bout we get through this shift, get some rest, and catch some dinner tomorrow night?"

"Perfect." Sara's expression was one of relief. She was glad to explain her and Grissom's predicament to someone who knew them both, and to someone who would keep it in confidence. She felt unburdened and ready to share with Catherine. Also, she knew there was plenty of gossip and speculation about their marriage. Catherine was the one person she could confide in who would keep the details to herself and still be able to vouch for their stability to the others when the speculation and gossip started up, and, most importantly, come off completely credible in the process.

Catherine on the other hand was oddly unsettled. While she had steadfastly sought out the details of the couple's life; she was now in unfamiliar territory. She always lapped up any tidbit Grissom or Sara threw out about themselves, but suddenly the married thing, the burn out, the separation from CSI, and their separation from each other, made her very uncomfortable. Her comfort level lost out to her curiosity and her need to make out a schedule, "Ok, we're good, how 'bout 7 o'clock at Clancy's?"

"I'm there," Sara winked.

Tbc.


	2. Chapter 2

**A/N: What a great response to my first chapter! It's nice to know I'm not the only one frustrated by the current state of affairs with our favorite couple….thanks for the reviews and support, I will try not to disappoint.**

After downing the Kona treat, the team went about their processing, documenting, evidence logging; all without any drama. Progress was made, and everyone left on time. The shift was completely uneventful; a rare, but welcome circumstance.

Sara went home to a quick shower, breakfast, and straight to bed. She laid there, her eyes were closed but her mind clicked a thousand miles an hour running through what she would divulge to Catherine. She kept going through the conversation in her mind, debating with herself what was safe to share, and what needed to stay private. After all, this concerned Grissom's privacy as well, so she felt pressure to do the right thing by him, more than anything.

An hour or two went by while Sara held mock conversations in her head, ultimately, and mercifully, succumbing to a deep slumber. Too deep to hear the tumblers turn on the front door lock. Too deep to hear someone stubbing their toe on a stray box of stored who knows what. And, definitely too deep to sense her love staring at her sleeping form by the side of their bed.

Grissom could only cock his head, inhale deeply, and absorb the sight of Sara before him. He wanted to slide in bed beside her, but she was squarely on his side. He knelt down, stroked her hair, and whispered, "You're in my spot."

Without waking, she instinctively moved toward him. "No," he stifled a laugh, "Dear, you need to go the other way." He gently nudged her, nothing. He pushed a bit firmer; a groan, and she turned over to her side. He shrugged, stripped down, and spooned in behind her. She sighed in her sleep, and pressed closer to him.

Out of nowhere, just like a bolt of lightning shot through her body, she leapt out of bed, nearly knocking over the lamp while trying to turn it on. They both stared at each other in shocked catatonia, hyperventilating with adrenaline.

"Oh, Thank God," Sara held her chest, "It's you."

A smile spreading across his face, "Surprise!"

"Gil," she slid back in bed, "I know you love to surprise me, but…"

Somewhat dejected, "But, I thought you _like_ to be surprised."

"The surprise in Costa Rica was the thrill of a lifetime, I'll never have a greater moment; I'll grant you that." Sara struggled with how to phrase her next sentence and not burst her lover's bubble. "I love surprises." She kissed him, "But, I also love the anticipation of reuniting with you."

He looked confused.

"I want to get time off at the lab, find little things to surprise you with, buy a new outfit to show off, find a new restaurant to wow you, and," she sighed, "mostly, I want to have you to look forward to." Cocking her head, "Do you understand?"

Grissom frowned, "But, I love to see your reaction when I appear out of the blue."

With mock rebellion Sara replied, "I should be the one appearing out of the blue, you're in _Paris_ after all, the city of Luuuuv."

"You've seen the people I hang with in Paris; you were bored to tears there."

Sara laughed, "Oh, yeah, the food was great, but the conversation might have been Greek."

"I think one of the guys does slip into Greek after a few glasses of wine," Grissom chuckled.

"Figures," Sara shrugged, "Anyway, you are better off without me butting into all that."

"You mean I'm better off not having to glance over and make sure you haven't nodded off?"

A playful punch on the arm, "That only happened once."

"Well, anyway, I think they call Vegas 'sin city' and that trumps the 'city of _love'_." Grissom grinned that 'I've got ya' look, "It is clearly you who needs to be spot checked."

The humor in the conversation was inescapable with the irony that they each trusted each other beyond comprehension; they harbored not an ounce of suspicion despite the long time and distance of their intermittent separation. Sara grinned, "But, a healthy marriage needs some compromise, right?"

"Ah, sure," Grissom responded, with all the hesitation of a man knowing he's heading for a trap.

"…give and take?"

"Uh, huh."

"….some tradeoffs?"

"Sure," came the shaky response.

"So," she moved closer, "How about we agree…." Sara was now hovering over Gil's lips, he was taking her essence in, waiting for what was surely a passionate, mind blowing kiss, "So why don't we compromise on this?" she whispered.

Grissom was slack jawed, eyes shut, "Huh?" he uttered.

"Did you hear any of that?"

"Ah," eyes open, head shaking, "Um, you were saying?"

Sara had to laugh, "I just thought you could throw in a planned visit along with the surprises."

Grissom smiled, "I love you so much; you have no idea."

"Mmmm," she purred, "You're right," planting a kiss, "I have _no_ idea; you better show me."

Grissom and Sara made love, slept, made love again, slept again, and awoke together with her alarm.

"Ugh," she moaned, turning off the infernal device. "This is awful!"

"What," Grissom replied sleepily.

"Well, there's no way I can call in tonight, and to top it off, I made a dinner date with Catherine."

"You and Cat?" he guffawed, "What's up with that?"

"She wants to know what's going on with me; like how long I'll be here."

A serious expression overtook his face, "So, what are you going to tell her?"

Now it was Sara's turn to laugh, "I haven't really figured that out yet."

"You can tell her the truth."

"The truth doesn't give her what she wants to know."

"I guess not," he shook his head.

He smiled and looked down, taking her hand, "How is it you are so patient with me?"

"You were patient with me, and," she tilted her head down to make eye contact, "When I left Vegas," she sighed, "and I left you, it was hardly comprehensible to _me_. How it was something you could ever begin to forgive me for," she paused, "I can easily let you take all the time you need to find your way away from the lab."

He smiled knowingly and nodded. "Ya know, lately I've made amazing contacts in Paris." Excitedly he continued, "I was only known in the forensic community, but now, well, it took some time, but, I'm back in the game!"

Sara beamed, "You just needed a few more at bats!"

He had to roll his eyes at her attempt at a baseball analogy. "It's a shame those at bats aren't paying better Euros."

"No worries, with you over there and the lab so short, I'm pulling OT like there's no tomorrow."

His eyebrows went up, "So we're getting in the red?"

"You bet," I've paid off everything and starting to stash it away.

Grissom smiled wide pulling Sara into a very tight embrace, "How did I get so blessed to have you in my life?"

Sara giggled despite his tight hold, "It goes both ways my dear."

His eyes closed knowingly. He had endured heartbreak he never imagined when she left, but in spite of that, respected her wish to be left to go off and find herself, out of pure love. He had no clue at the time what she was going through, but now he knew first hand. Fortunately for the couple, letting Sara do just that allowed them to ultimately unite. And now, she was the only soul alive who could understand what he needed to do in leaving CSI and Vegas. She had just done it all. She could let him go off and find himself, and she'd be waiting for him, no questions asked. _You do what you need to do; I'll be waiting for you when you're done._

He squeezed her impossibly tighter, not wanting to let go of her loving energy. They savored the closeness for several minutes. Finally Sara broke the news that she needed to get ready for dinner and then a shift, the alarm had signaled the end of this bliss.

"This is just what I mean about these surprises," Sara spit out as she exited the bed, "I mean, I have dinner plans, I'm scheduled to work every night," she shook her head, "all these nights I could be with you!"

Grissom smiled, "And now my ulterior motive." He rose to embrace her once again, "I need time here, _alone_, to go through my old studies. I have a lot of references to get organized, and if you were here with me," he chuckled, "I wouldn't get anything done."

Sara rolled her eyes. She completely understood. Not many women would, but that's what made them so perfect. "I love you more than I can say," and she kissed him passionately. She reluctantly broke away to dress for dinner and work. Meanwhile, Grissom started poking around boxes of files. His attention was momentarily hijacked by a stray picture of the couple Sara had propped up haphazardly, without even a frame. He savored the memory, but quickly refocused. "Besides, I met someone who had some input on how to get our grant up the approval ladder a bit faster."

Sara's eyes lit up, "What! How?"

"Well, I need to amend the protocol, and drop in some references from my old work," he called out from a sea of boxes in what used to be their living room. "I think once this semester is done; I'll be ready to move on."

By now Sara was standing beside him, "I thought by now, the grant would have been funded, and I would be getting set up until the end of your commitment in Paris, but here we are."

"Yes," he nodded somewhat dejectedly. "I never thought it would take this long, and I'm not sure what I'll do if it's not funded before I'm finished lecturing at the Sorbonne."

"You could come here, with me," Sara offered with considerable hesitation, "I mean, not work at the lab, of course, just…."

He cut her off, "You know I can't do that." His tone was emphatic.

"You're right," she shook her head, "I know better than anyone that you can't do that; you _shouldn't_ do that."

"How about a trip?" he offered.

"It's gotta be a cheap one," she laughed.

He grabbed her up for one last kiss before she left, "I think this is what they mean by going 'full circle.' Think about it" he grinned, "once upon a time, in this very townhouse, I was suggesting you to just come back here, and you were suggesting a trip."

They embraced, savoring the closeness. Sara's face was buried in Grissom's chest when she spoke, "Did you ever think you would not know from one month to the next what the heck you would be doing; what continent you would be on?"

"Not only could I not imagine that, but I couldn't have achieved that freedom without your guidance." His drew back with a stare that bore through to her soul, "I owe you my _life_. I was dead when you rescued me."

Sara drew a shaky breath. "Wow."

"Now, you go explain all that to Catherine," and he returned to his boxes.

"What?"

He laughed heartily, "I know about making out schedules, all she needs to know is you may only have a week's notice. She's much more organized than I was; she wants to make out a schedule for months in advance. The bottom line is that you have to be able to accommodate losing someone at any time. I lost Warrick; I lost you," he became emotional and had to pause; "she can handle knowing you are week to week. That's not a burden," he said with his supervisor voice.

"So that's what you think I should tell her and leave it at that?"

He threw down the files he was thumbing through, clearly angry, "They already got more from you than they deserve. You took a huge risk coming back!"

"No," Sara pleaded, "No, I _wanted_ to come back."

Grissom was seething, and silent. Sara responded, "I invested too much in beating these demons. I beat back the ghosts from my past. I found another way of life. I dealt with my memories. I needed to prove that I shored up my emotions." She cupped his face, and looked deep into his eyes, "I needed this."

"What if I lost you again?" he whispered.

"That couldn't happen. I knew the signs. I could leave this time. But," she shook her head for emphasis, "but, if I could do it," smiling, "then I beat it! I'm whole again." Her smile spoke volumes, "It feels great. I've never been so comfortable with being a CSI." She winked, "It feels great."

"It was still a risk," he countered.

She smiled, "I wouldn't take a risk that would take me away from you again."

They shared a smile, "The grant should come in before I'm done at the Sorbonne, and we need to get organized down there right away, it will fall to you in the meantime."

"And if it doesn't come in until after you're done there?" Sara asked with a wry smile.

"Once, I'm done there, we need to be together, _somewhere_," his expression was one of contentment, "and somewhere means NOT here."

Sara left to meet Catherine; still unsure of how she would handle the inevitable questions, but understanding all too well Grissom's aversion to Vegas at this point in his journey. She knew the pain first hand, and knew that she would be gone when he was free, or when the grant came in, but no one knew when any of that was going to happen.

tbc……

**a/n: Please stay tuned; I have a few more insight to share.... thank you in advance for r & r.....**


	3. Chapter 3

While Sara was trying to tear herself away from Grissom, Catherine was dressing for thier dinner, preoccupied with what she might learn of the couple. For someone as adept in reading people as Catherine, Sara, in particular, had been by far, her biggest failure. After all, her ability to read people is what first drew her policeman friend to run his baffling cases by her, and one by one, she cut through to the heart of things, understanding human nature seemingly like no one else, even picking up on the smallest of details, until he finally succeeded in persuading her to pursue a career as a CSI. Those skills only sharpened over the years, which made her habitual misread of Sara Sidle that much more perplexing, and downright frustrating. She had a much better read on Grissom, despite his silence. She even knew he was seeing someone on the sly, but never, ever, put it together that it was Sara all that time. Ultimately, she foresaw his unfathomable departure from CSI, before anyone else in the lab, including Gil Grissom himself.

It was Sara who baffled her to no end. The most glaring 'miss' was not seeing that Sara had a front row seat to horrific domestic violence in her past. She never saw that 'victim' behavior; instead she saw an overzealous crusade Catherine mistakenly believed was out of some feminist hippie cause of hers. Frequent clashes over domestic abuse cases only pushed Catherine further down the path to the wrong conclusion. Once things came to a head with Ecklie, she noticed Grissom avoided certain assignments for Sara. Thoroughly convinced as she was that avoidance was not a prudent tact for such misguided handling of such issues; Catherine boldly confronted Gil often behind closed doors insisting that he take a more direct approach with Sara. The fact that no one could predict what might surface in certain cases, that potentially puts Sara in situations that she might not be able to handle thus creating who knows what kind of havoc; the argument had merit, on the surface, anyway. Realizing she would not let up on the issue, Grissom knew he would have to act to make Catherine realize there was whole lot more that had been done for Sara in addition to the case assignments. He reluctantly divulged just enough to lead Catherine on a search of public records to learn Sara's true motives. He managed to 'tell' the tale, without literally betraying Sara.

Catherine remembered that day, as she was picking through her earrings, determined to find a certain pair that had been missing for a few weeks. She paused to recall Grissom's very subtle hint to search Sara's parents in the system. He discreetly allowed that since he learned about her family, she had someone to confide in, as well as intermittent counseling, and was far more in control since she was not trying to handle everything by herself. He finished by sternly reminding her how private Sara was, and letting this knowledge out would be devastating to her. Catherine shook her head over her jewelry drawer recalling how with their CSI resources, it took less than half an hour to have the entire misery of Sara's childhood scroll across her computer screen. _How did I miss __**that!**_ Catherine mulled in frustration of both missing the signs in Sara for _years,_and for having to give up on the earrings. Choosing another set of earrings, she paused in her reflection in the mirror. Catherine was hardly brought up by Ozzie and Harriet, but compared to Sara's childhood; it was a Norman Rockwell painting. And that knowledge, stayed with her like white on rice; she never let on to anyone, not even Sara, that she knew anything about Sara's past.

Driving to the restaurant, her preoccupation continued. She thought on the other day, at the lab, she paused outside the break room, catching Sara in an idle moment. She observed her intently, candidly; one more shot at reading her, _as if that were possible,_ she mulled in frustration. Sara's body language was relaxed, she had just been chatting on her cell, _Grissom, perhaps,_ and she had a genuine grin as she closed out the conversation. As she lowered the phone, the grin remained, her eyes closed as her head tilted ever so slightly upwards. Catherine devoured the signs, they all pointed to contentment, satisfaction, and overall well being. She sighed, pulling to a stop at a red light. _How can the same person run from a job and a city with such aversion that you leave behind a committed lover; and then, return to the same job, same city, once said lover, now __**husband**__, is gone, and be more at ease with everything than at any point before? Aagghh, stop thinking about it before you have a wreck, _Catherine had to caution herself.

The restaurant was right up Sara's alley, but Catherine liked the choice as well, from the quiet atmosphere of the converted old house, sans any form of a neon light, to the delicious, but healthy, menu options, very much the opposite of most of Vegas. She arrived to find Sara already there, _a good sign, _Catherine optimistically thought to herself. An even better sign; however, upon seeing her arrival, Sara popped up and greeted Catherine with open arms. A patented 'girlfriend' hug, a rare occurrence over the years for these two. _Ah, just pile on the question marks, _Catherine thought to herself as she welcomed the embrace.

Settling in with some small talk, Catherine decided it was time to jump into the deep end; she was there to get a date on the calendar, but it was also important for her to convey her appreciation for what Sara had been able to do upon her return. "Sara, before we get into this, I have to tell you how incredibly valuable you have been to me these past few months." Shaking her head for emphasis, "I don't know that I could have turned it around without you."

Sara smiled, "Wow, thanks, Catherine, hearing you say that," she shrugged, "that made it all worth it."

"Seriously, Sara, even an experienced CSI would have an orientation period to adjust to our lab and personnel, but you just came in and took off _immediately_. You got Riley's open cases closed quicker than she ever could have." They shared a brief laugh as Catherine continued, "And, the relationships you have with everyone, the great chemistry with Dr. Ray; I mean, you really brought us together."

"Catherine, I'm so touched to hear this, I don't know what to say," she shrugged once more.

"What I don't get is how are you able to do it?" amazement in her voice, "I mean, when you left," searching for words, "I guess I could never see you coming back here, I mean, working at the lab, of course. The way you and Grissom were so in love; we couldn't understand it." Sara shifted uncomfortably after being reminded of one of the lowest points of her tumultuous life. Her smile was gone, but Catherine continued, looking down at the menu, unfortunately she was oblivious to Sara's reaction. "We always hoped against hope that you would at least _move_ back to Vegas, even if you didn't work in the lab. I mean we missed _you_, but worse than that we really had our hands full putting up with Grissom those first few months you were gone." Catherine chuckled, remembering Grissom acting like a lovesick puppy; he was in a bear of a mood pretty much all of the time. It was about then that she glanced up from the menu, looking for Sara's response.

"Cat, I, aah," Sara was searching for words, seeming to want to find them somewhere on the ceiling actually, she couldn't make eye contact with Catherine, and was really not that sure what to do, "I'm not sure what to say, I mean, I intended to try to explain things as they are now. You kind of threw me for a loop with talk about the past."

Catherine was now reading Sara like never before, like an open book, a book with _pictures_ no less; the pain was back, the pain she bore in the months, even years before she left. Catherine now recognized it. The signs were all there, not as severe, but there to be sure. That edgy look on her face, the tension in her body, the palpable battle against her emotions bubbling to the surface, Catherine had seen it all before, but not until now since Sara had returned. "Oh, my God," she put the menu down, and grabbed Sara's hand, "I can see what that did to you, please forgive me." She paused, sincerely sorry for taking Sara to this place, "No more questions, promise," She tilted her head downward to try to make eye contact with Sara who was now staring at the table, "Please, forgive me."

After a few seemingly endless moments, Sara looked up and mouthed, "Okay."

Mercifully, the waitress appeared just about then to take their order. Once that was done, they could start over, leave the opening train wreck, and try to move on. Catherine felt awful. She sincerely wanted to understand Sara, but she didn't want to see that pain on her face to do it. She kept her word, but afraid Sara wouldn't speak, she tried to reassure her, "Sara, I meant what I said, no more questions. You just tell me what you want me to know."

Sara finally cracked a smile, "I guess, you deserve to know what happened to me." With a humorless laugh, "You all do, the whole team I mean." Looking down, a bit ashamed, "I left all of you when I left; I hurt my friends, and I nearly broke Grissom's heart, but you must understand, I tried so hard to stay" she whispered emphatically, before succumbing to a few involuntary sobs.

Catherine didn't know what to say. In the time she was gone, they were out of touch with Sara, and Grissom was as tightlipped as ever where she was concerned. This little revelation that she desperately tried to stay in Vegas only muddied the water even more as far as Catherine could tell. She was pessimistic that Sara could reveal anything to her that would genuinely make sense of her actions, because at this point nothing remotelly made sense.

"I'm going to try to explain things, but I need you to keep the details to yourself. I think knowing my story, you can help the others to maybe understand things," She grinned before adding, "without hanging that dirty laundry out there for all the neighbors to see."

They shared a laugh, and like the medicine it is, the tension relaxed its hold on them, and Sara took a deep breath before speaking…..

tbc…..

**a/n: Well, you can't do a GSR story without at least a little bit of angst, but please, don't blame Catherine. Her inadvertant mistake is more consistent with her cluelessness regarding Sara than any intent to hurt her. BTW, So sorry about the cliff hanger ending, NOT intentional, but a very natural break in the story. Also, on a technical note, the spellchecker toggle button is acting like a major undo switch. I may have made a few edits that did not have the luxury of a last spell check, and my dyslexic brain will never see 'em, so apologizing in advance....**


	4. Chapter 4

Sara took a deep breath, and then calmly posed a question, "Over the years, I've seen you become frustrated with the time away from Lindsay, away from a social life, and just with the sheer exhaustion this job brings, but," gently shaking her head, "you've never become frustrated with the job itself, have you?"

Cat was taken aback by the question, "Well, no, I suppose," a bit confused, "You mean the cases?"

"I mean the _pain, suffering, and misery_ of the victims in our cases."

"Oh" she nodded, "I see…then, I guess, I mean, of course, at times, you feel sad for some of them, you wouldn't be human if you didn't."

"No, I mean have you ever gotten to a place where you feel it with every case, every time out."

"Well, no then, no, I haven't felt that _exactly_."

"I hope you never do," she breathed out, "The weight of it brings you to your knees."

Catherine was now wide eyed and slack jawed with anticipation, she had that feeling you get when pouring over a particularly pesky puzzle, but one piece just went in, and you just knew, it was about to all come together, right before you. But, it didn't quite happen, not just yet.

"I didn't understand it at the time," she shrugged, "I just knew that I was about to fall apart. I wasn't able to keep it together any longer, and Grissom," her voice cracked on his name. She regained her composure, "Truth is, I stayed in the job far longer than I should have because I couldn't bear to leave him." She smiled, "Everyone probably thought I was leaving him suddenly, but I had stayed here just for him for so long, I had become a fractured soul, incapable of even maintaining a relationship. It's so ironic."

Catherine's mind was trying to process the scene Sara laid out of what was happening at that time, and it was slowly coming into focus. "Do you know why you started to feel that way; I don't think I understand that?"

Sara grinned that sideways grin, "I didn't understand it when I left, and Grissom," she rolled her eyes, "What I ever did to deserve him, I'll never know," continuing after a sigh, "He understood even less than I, which wasn't much, but he stood by, trusted me, and let me do what I felt I needed to do, as incredibly painful as that was for him."

"I must admit, I couldn't understand why he wouldn't go after you."

"I didn't know why at the time of course, but I knew I needed to be away, I needed to be on my own, I needed to face my own demons, and put myself back together." Taking a sip of water, she continued, "The last thing I needed was someone to be beholden to; I had nothing left to give someone else, and I loved him so much, it hurt all the more." She had to pause to regain her composure. "Most men would have come after you anyway, you know, take charge, and insist on getting you the help _they_ think you need. Grissom's not like that. He trusted me, even when I couldn't even give him a decent explanation at the time." She shook her head with amazement, "His trust in me was the support that got me through those first few months. It was so hard…." Her voice trailed off as she seemed to be lost in thought.

She looked up with a smile, "Anyway, I faced my family, confronted some issues there, long story by the way," she almost giggled, "And got some therapy. But the best therapy was to go off and find life."

Catherine looked confused, so Sara explained, "I went where life was teaming, the rainforest; lush, green, gorgeous, and there I studied the fascinating animals there and slowly found my way out of my old life. I was starting to live life without that crippling emotional pain. It was so liberating."

By now the food had arrived, but in between bites, Sara freely continued, "My God, Catherine, I finally escaped it all. It had been so hard to leave here, to put it behind me, you have no idea. I stayed in touch with Grissom, but I, too, thought, I'd never be back. Our relationship was in real jeopardy at that point."

"And, yet here you are," Catherine couldn't resist putting out the obvious.

Sara grinned at the paradox, but didn't quite jump to the present just yet. "How do _you_ think burn out happens?"

Catherine straightened at the surprise question, "Oh, well, let's see, ah, somebody works too hard for too long, and then they just don't want to, or maybe they can't do it anymore."

Sara smiled while she gently shook her head, "That would have been my answer before it happened to me, and that's probably the case for most jobs, but not ours." Catherine's face was contorted in confused expression as Sara set out to explain, "Our job requires a certain detachment. We can't do it without that detachment. So that armor, that detachment, that allows us to do our job and not get consumed by the emotion of it." Catherine's hand went to her forehead as she contemplated the analogy Sara just put forth. "Catherine," regaining her attention, "CSI burnout happens when there's a chink in the armor, the misery can seep in," her voice lowered, "and take you down."

Now it was Catherine who was becoming emotional as she was starting to see things through Sara, and Grissom's, perspective.

"For me, everything came apart when the horror of the cases we worked was thrown open by the horror of, ah,…"

She stopped abruptly, swallowing the words, and searching for what to do next. Catherine knew what she almost said. Catherine knew the extent of the horror of her past, and clearly that was the chink in the armor she almost referred to. So it was her past rising up demanding that she deal with that and at the same time making her unable to detach herself from the suffering of her current cases. _My God, I had no idea the pain she carried, no wonder she had to leave it all and run to save herself._

Catherine slid around to put her arm over her shoulders as tears were threatening to pour. "You don't have to tell me anymore," She whispered, "I get it now."

Sara softly sobbed, relieved not to divulge any more to get the picture drawn. "You know," she managed a slight grin, "We've butted heads many times over the past when I got too involved emotionally in my cases. Now that I understand things, I see that I _went into_ this job with a chink in the armor. It was only a matter of time before the chink became a huge rent, and I could no longer keep it together."

Sara took a few minutes to regain her composure, then nodded and continued, "Catherine I owe you an explanation." Catherine was stunned, wondering what she would reveal. "What I never told you is that I grew up in a household with rampant domestic violence. That's my chink. That's what forced me over the top emotionally in cases, and that's what raged to the surface after my abduction. I've finally dealt with those issues; it took a life savings, over a year of therapy and world travel, and eventually, a fulfilling marriage, but, hey" she shrugged, "No more chink."

They shared a hearty laugh, "So what's for dessert?" Sara proposed. Catherine could only shake her head. She was still hard at work digesting the conversation, forget the meal.

The analogy Sara put forth explained everything, from her early over the top pursuit of domestic violence cases, to her abrupt departure from CSI, and Grissom, right up to the present; how it is she is working again as a CSI in Vegas and seemingly happier at it than she's ever been. It all made sense.

What didn't make sense was Grissom, and their marriage. How long would she be here? The whole point of their meeting still went unanswered, so far.

tbc…..


	5. Chapter 5

Given all that had transpired, Catherine felt like it was certainly safe to ask questions again. "So, Sara, I can't tell you how grateful I am that you explained yourself to me. I never, ever, even remotely understood you until this, but now, well," she sighed, "it all makes sense, everything, from day one. There's only one problem."

"What's that?"

"Um, well, so how does that tell me how long you plan on being here?"

They laughed again, "I'm coming to that."

Desert and coffee orders now complete, Sara sighed and continued. "Now, that you understand my CSI burnout, and you understand Grissom possibly even better than me, I think you see what he's going through."

Catherine paused to think on that. She had seen Grissom's pain, his aversion to cases towards the end, but now in light of Sara's analogy she was trying to put it all together, "I'm close, but I need you to walk me through it; I take it you're saying it started with a _chink_ in his armor."

"Yes," she gazed downward, "The damage surely happened because of the pain I caused him." Her head in her hands, "It killed me to hurt him like that, but I couldn't help him the way I was. At any rate, eventually, he became just like me, feeling the pain of me leaving him, feeling the pain and misery of every case he worked, and then feeling trapped. He couldn't leave for his own reasons."

"I get it now," Catherine blew out, "It is the same process, it's the same burn out, and you both stayed beyond what you should have making it all the more difficult to escape."

"You do get it, Cat," she nodded, "He's now doing what I had to do. He's off finding life away from Vegas, from CSI, and he's got to do it without me putting in my two cents every time he has a choice to make."

"No wonder you are so content to be so far away."

"Turnabout is fair play, as they say. He actually did the same for me under far less clear conditions. I owe him the freedom to go off and find out that he is someone other than that CSI entomologist."

They didn't miss a beat even when dessert was delivered. "So what's he doing now?"

Sara smiled wide, "At this moment, he is at the townhouse pouring over old research he did," and a huge bite of chocolate pie went into her mouth, while Catherine's coffee spewed out all over the table.

"What!" she managed, "He's _here!"_

Sara laughed, "He surprised me earlier today, just showed up out of the blue to go through that old stuff."

"What? I mean, well, why didn't you say so from the start, we have to get you off tonight," she stammered while furiously wiping up the mess she made, "And why didn't you say something, you should be eating with _him_!"

Sara giggled some more, "Catherine, I appreciate that, but he needs some time there on his own. Believe me, it's all I can do to give it to him, but he needs it, really."

Catherine was stunned, "Can I see him," she spoke in barely a whisper.

Sara froze in her hardy attack on the dessert before her, "I, ah, maybe I said too much."

"Why? I mean after all we've been through over these years, why can't we say a simple 'hi'?"

"Because even 'hi' isn't simple when you are trying to escape!" She said in an emphatic whisper. Sara looked away; then refocused her energy, "You understand, but only to a point." She sighed, and then more calmly, "I honestly hope you never understand, Catherine. It's something I hope you never have to reconcile in your life." Catherine was quietly trying to wrap her head around the fact that Grissom was in Vegas and couldn't manage a lousy visit. "He can't make contact with his old life, with the lab; it will bring up the cases, the victims, all the misery you both witnessed. I know. I came back frequently to be with him after I left, but I couldn't come near the lab or any of the team. Even the thought of it was paralyzing." She tried to get Catherine's focus, "You'll see him when the time is right, trust me."

Catherine sat back in her chair trying to process everything. It was making sense, but it was an awful lot to digest. The knowledge that Sara visited Grissom without one word to her friends on the team was sobering. They all thought that her visit to help after Warrick's death was her first time back. Just as shocking was the news that Grissom was in Vegas, _as they spoke_. Sara and Catherine were locked in a reciprocal gaze. The silence seemed to take over, and neither one knew quite what should be said, or asked, next. Finally Sara spoke up, "To really answer your question about what he's doing now, I could have done a much better job. As you know, he's lecturing at the Sorbonne in Paris. It doesn't pay much, but the contacts he makes doing it are invaluable. As prominent as he was in forensic entomology, he was just as unknown outside of it. This is invigorating him beyond words; he's spending all his days and nights discovering new ways to pursue entomology."

Catherine nodded, then smiling, "So, um, once again, how long do you plan on being here?"

This time around Sara let go her patented Sara laugh, trying to reign it in, "I, um, yeah, I'm coming to that," she managed between guffaws.

Catherine was smiling in response, "Hey, at this rate, you'll get to that next month, and we need to get to the lab _tonight_."

Nodding, "I know, but I can tell you this, right now. I'm on borrowed time here. I accomplished what I came here to do, I helped out people I really care about, reunited with friends, raised some sorely needed cash, but mostly, I proved to myself that I really _can_ do this job." She shrugged, "So, really, I could move on anytime."

Eyebrows up, "Really?" Catherine's head was shaking, "Then maybe I should ask why you are still here?"

"Here's the deal," she said pulling out her calendar. "There, the date circled is my last day for sure. Grissom finishes in Paris that week, I'm going there to spend it with him, and then help him pack up to come back."

"That's it then?" Catherine sounded so surprised, "Why didn't you just say so earlier?"

"It's not that simple," Sara sighed, "I'm really week to week _until_ that date."

"Oh," Catherine replied tersely.

"As you may know, we've applied for a grant to fund a research project in Costa Rica. Well, we fully expected to have heard about it by now. In fact, that's what Gil's working on here; he's trying to attach some former references of his work to bolster our application."

"So, you're saying if that comes in, you are out?"

"That's exactly what I'm saying."

"I see," Catherine folded her arms, "Then," she sighed, "I will be happy to have you for as long as you can stay with us."

"Thank you, Catherine," Sara replied sincerely, "for everything."

They wisely switched to more light hearted banter while getting the check paid and rushing out as they were surely going to be late to the lab. Outside the restaurant, rushing off to their cars, Sara suddenly thought of something else she needed to tell Catherine, "Wait, Cat," running after her.

Catherine spun around, "What is it?" concern in her voice.

Sara then looked a little sheepish, "Well, ah, this may sound a little, well, silly, but I promise you it's important."

"What in the world are you trying to say, Sara, we're running very late."

"Um, well, here goes," inhaling deeply, "Grissom really doesn't like the 'B.O.' word," and she resorted to the air quotes for emphasis.

"Body Odor?" Catherine shrieked, exasperation in her tone.

"No," Sara rolled her eyes, "Burn Out!"

"Huh?"

"What I'm trying to say is, that whenever you _do_ speak to Grisssom, he doesn't like to talk about 'burn out', you can call it anything else you want, but not that."

"What is that about?"

Sara inhaled deeply, "Um, I haven't really figured it out, but I think it's just not how he wants to think of his exit from CSI. Even though he doesn't deny the process I just described to you, he just _really _doesn't like the term 'burn out'."

"So what euphemism do we apply to it?" she asked, with dripping sarcasm.

"He went as far as he could as a CSI, so it was time for a change."

"Sounds like burn out to me," Catherine replied, and they both shared a hearty laugh.

tbc…..


	6. Chapter 6

**a/n: I had a fair amount of block heading into this chapter, throw in my kids' exams, and my friends' kids' graduations, killer work week, oh well, excuses, excuses. I think the chapter could be better, but at this point, I think it's as good as I can do right now. Hope it reads well as it's so important to the story. I plan to post once more to wrap up this ramble. Thanks for reading, and I really appreciate the reviews.....**

Arriving to the lab finding the team waiting in the break room for assignments, Catherine was rushed to get things organized, but as always, she got everyone where they needed to be. As Sara headed out in the field with Greg, Catherine studied her exit in light of everything she had revealed. She and Greg had such rapport, they were clearly very happy to get an assignment together, and yet, for the better part of a year, Sara was unable to deliver a simple 'hi' to him amidst her odyssey to find her way out of Vegas. _And, now look at her, at them, what a journey she's been on._

Greg was _thrilled_ to get assigned with Sara, that pairing had been rare since her return. He and Nick were now the back bone of the grave team and often worked alone since the team was still short handed. Sara was frequently assigned to Dr. Ray; his progress was stunning, but he still lacked experience, and Sara was the perfect mentor. Tonight, there was an especially detailed scene that needed some collective expertise, and, with new insight, Catherine knew that Sara and Greg's was a friendship with a short time left to enjoy the simple act of sharing the challenge of working a scene together.

Greg wasted no time in trying to pry the dinner conversation out of Sara. Jumping into the Denali, before he was even out of the parking lot, "So, how was your dinner with Catherine?"

"Very nice, thank you."

"Well, what'd you tell her, you know," he shrugged, "how long do we get to keep you?"

She laughed, "I'm week to week for a while."

He blew out a deep sigh in response.

"Greg, you must know Grissom and I don't intend to live like this indefinitely."

"To be honest, Sara, I have no idea what to think, you don't share much."

"I'm so sorry, Greg," she shook her head, "It's a bit complicated. Let's just say, right now we're each doing what we need to in order to prepare for the next phase of our lives."

"If you say so," came the sarcastic reply.

Now it was Sara's turn to sigh, "Grissom is off making contacts with entomologists outside of the forensic field so that he can pursue new avenues of research, and I'm, well," she looked out the window, "I'm reuniting with friends I've missed terribly, I'm making money which I really needed to do," she laughed, "and," she looked back at him with a very serious tone, "I'm proving to myself that I really can be a CSI without falling apart or coming unglued."

Greg was now smiling as he glanced at her, she returned the look and the smile, "So, we're ok?"

"Yeah," nodding, "Yeah, we're good." With his attention back on the road, "So what is the next phase, that research project in Costa Rica?"

"Yes," she beamed, "I can't wait to get back there!" Sara turned to face him, "Greg, you must come visit us there. You can't believe how gorgeous and alive that place is. We're so happy when we're there."

"I'd like that," he replied as they pulled into the knot of police cars and EMT's at their scene, "But, um, Grissom would be ok with a visit from me?"

"Of course he would," she added, "He's not your supervisor anymore, ya' know."

The scene was just as Catherine had predicted, very detailed, requiring extremely meticulous and even tedious processing. Greg and Sara approached it with their years of seamless cooperation and their expeditious methods of processing. They managed to exchange lighthearted kidding back and forth between sharing their observations of the scene. Securing the evidence collected into the Denali they headed back to the lab to start logging it all in.

Greg noticed Sara rubbing the back of her neck while stretching, "Hey, Sara, you look tired," Greg offered, "why don't you clock out early and let me finish up here."

"Wow, Greg, you read my mind." She straightened up, "You sure it's ok?"

"You've done it for me more times than I can say, but," he grinned and shrugged, "I'll miss you."

Sara gave Greg a tight hug and flashed a wide Sara smile in return; she couldn't wait to get back to Grissom. On her way out she stuck her head in Catherine's office, "Hey boss," she said mockingly, "Ok if I leave Greg to log in and I clock out early?"

Catherine laughed out loud, "Um, no way, I have some paperwork I need help with." Sara's jaw dropped, but Catherine quickly went over to Sara, softly, so as not to be overheard, "Go home to your husband, and…" she paused, "let him know, when he's ready, I would love to say 'hi'."

"I will be happy to pass that along, but, truthfully," she grimaced, "he's not going to be happy I told you he was here. You _have_ to keep that between us," she pleaded.

"Of course," she reassured Sara, "And don't worry, I _do_ get it, the longer I think on it. I really do."

Sara let out a deep sigh, "You have a gift of understanding people, there is no doubt, and," she laughted, "your capacity for understanding people is more than Grissom and I possess combined."

Catherine couldn't help but smile in response, and Sara continued, "Judging from the texts I'm getting, I'm looking at a major debriefing when I get back, he's going to want to know every tidbit from dinner conversation!"

Catherine softly laughed while Sara started heading down the hall, "Thanks again, Catherine," she called back.

"One more thing," Catherine called out, "I'm overstaffed next shift, so don't bother coming in."

"What?" Sara exclaimed, surprise in her voice, "Are you sure?"

"I better not see you, am I clear? Ecklie's on me for your overtime. I mean it!"

Sara's grin grew impossibly brighter, "Yes, ma'am." She mouthed the words, 'thank you', and turned again to leave.

Catherine smiled and nodded, happy to see Sara get out early for a change given who was waiting at home for her.

She entered their townhouse to find Grissom amidst mountains of paper stacks, glasses perched on his nose, thumbing intently through a file. "What's the name of the hurricane that blew through here?"

He looked up in surprise; he had been concentrating on the file so hard he hadn't heard the door open. "Oh, my! You got off early," he rose to greet her, "How'd you pull that off?" as he pulled her into a warm embrace.

"Greg offered to finish up, and I took him up on it."

"That's nice, but I had plans to clean this up before you got home."

Sara could only laugh, "I think I would have to work a triple for that to happen."

He playfully frowned, "Is that any way to talk to your breakfast chef?"

"Breakfast?" she echoed optimistically.

"How do blueberry pancakes sound?"

Her face lit up as she planted a passionate kiss on his lips, "Whoa," he exclaimed as she broke off the kiss, "How lucky am I to have a woman I can turn on with the flip of a spatula," he quipped, "Now," delivering his own kiss, "Why don't you get a shower while I fire up the skillet."

"Gladly," she couldn't help herself from nibbling a bit on his neck before turning to the bedroom to get cleaned up.

The shower was as refreshing as ever, but this was one shower she didn't want to linger in too long. She didn't even dry her hair, letting her curls frame her face, and grabbing up her robe, she entered the kitchen to find the mountains of papers had been cleared, the table was now set for breakfast, and a heaping plate of pancakes was being set in her place there.

"Impeccable timing my dear," Grissom spoke with a sparkle in his eye.

"I can't believe you're really here," she sighed, "It's just so wonderful."

"It is wonderful to be together for once, but," he shrugged, "I still get an odd feeling here." He reached over to take her hand, "I see why you couldn't stay with me here even after you left the lab."

She nodded, "I can't believe how patient you were with me through all of that."

"I trusted you," he said matter of factly. "And, I knew you loved me."

Sara nodded. She didn't want to talk about those times; they were dark, uncertain times for the couple. Looking back, it was a miracle they stayed together through all of it. Wanting to change the subject, "So, um, how long can you stay?"

"I have to be back in Paris Monday, so I'm flying out Sunday on the red eye."

"I can't wait until we get back to Costa Rica," she blew out, as she piled up a blueberry filled bite on her fork.

"I think about it every day," he replied. "I think that was the most alive I've felt in so many years," his voice trailed off as his mind was clearly wandering to another place and time.

Sara smiled a contented smile while savoring her breakfast, and especially savoring her time with Grissom. Even the simple act of eating a meal together was something to cherish. Becoming that much more special over the recent years that were filled with separations. Even marriage couldn't prevent another unavoidable span of time apart. They were accustomed to being apart over their lives together. Whether they were apart because of a job that prevented them from getting involved in the first place, or being apart because of a job that tore them into pieces as individuals, it was always the job's fault. The job that first brought them together almost destroyed everything they had. They were now ready to put _the job _behind them and settle into a new life. They were almost there.

Grissom's focus returned, "So, how'd dinner go," he asked innocently.

Sara rolled her eyes, "We covered a lot, it was good, really good. In fact, it was probably long overdue."

"Why the eye roll?" he inquired, a bit suspiciously now.

"Oh, well, I mentioned to her about my family, kinda trying to explain some of my actions in the past."

Grissom stiffened; he had never lied to Sara about anything, but feared how she might interpret his hint to Catherine, and wondered if Catherine admitted knowing already, "How did she react?"

Sara shrugged, "She just thanked me for telling her, and said that now she understood me better."

Grissom breathed easier, "So you really covered a lot more than how long you plan to stay in the job."

"Oh, yeah," laughing, "But, like I said it was all good, except," now it was Sara who stiffened, she would just as soon not bring this up, but she felt she needed to own up, "I slipped up a little bit."

His eyebrows went up, "Oh?"

"I let it slip that you are here."

"What?" Shaking his head, "How could you do that? I always protected you when you came back and couldn't visit the team." He was visibly upset, "So I guess she wants to see me?"

Sara sighed, "Yes, but, I explained everything, and she gets it, she understands, she'll see you when the time is right."

"How could she possibly understand that?" he spit out as he left the table.

"You know," she laughed, "I'm not sure. I mean, she didn't get it at first, but then after shift, she told me she thought on everything, and she does get it now." She rose to stand with him, "I could see it in her face, she really _does_ get it."

He took a deep breath, nodded slightly, and slipping his arm around her waist, "I'm so sorry I jumped on you, I just know how desperate the team was to see you, and it was so hard to honor your request to visit me and not let them even know about it, much less to visit them too."

"Now I know how hard that was on you, but back then I was drowning in my own pain and frailties so that I couldn't see it." She groaned, "So, now that it's me in that exact same position, how do I do? I screw it up, _royally_," she said with a grimace and a head slap.

Grissom had to laugh, tightening his hold on her. It was clear she got caught up with the sharing or was caught off guard, and it just slipped out. At least it was Catherine; someone who was able to understood things that he couldn't remotely fathom, it happened all the time, especially when it concerned the human condition.

"I'll call her later," he kissed her, "It will be fine."

She gazed into his gloriously deep blue eyes, seeing that he was truly fine with it, and so relieved she was that she didn't hide from the truth, she put it out there, and that he had forgiven her. There was really nothing they couldn't share at this point in their relationship. He closed his eyes as he leaned in for a sensual, soft kiss, and continued down her jaw line, to her neck. His hands meanwhile, were wandering underneath the robe, and breakfast was officially over.

They stumbled in between gropes and nibbles to their bedroom, to savor yet another splendid moment together. Not only was their relationship strong enough to survive long separations, but it flourished and grew in their eventual reunion. Even a simple occasion, breakfast, was something to cherish after their long separation, so making love, well, that was something that was renewed all over again, allowing them to feel their love more intensely than either could have ever dreamed. Sara and Gil were a couple who grew stronger in their love when forced to be apart, almost as if it was their destiny somehow.

Expressing that love, with stomachs quite full after feasting on decadent pancakes, left them quite spent, and drifting off to sleep before Sara could tell Grissom that he would not have the privacy of their townhouse the next night; she would be there to distract him, _which_ could not have happened if it had not been for her slip up with Catherine.

Just more proof that what looks like adversity, usually has a bright side after all.

tbc……


	7. Chapter 7

Sara awakened to find Grissom had already risen and was in fact back pouring over the stacks of files that once again threatened to take over their living space. She padded into the kitchen, only one eye partially open, and straight to the coffee pot. Grissom chuckled at her post slumber stupor, "Sleeping beauty awakens!"

"Ha, ha," she retorted.

"I'm making some headway here; I've got several studies that lead into our current proposal. I think that will strengthen the original application and get this thing moving."

Sara brightened at the news, "Really?" she glanced over at the reams of papers strewn throughout the place, "That's amazing; I'm surprised you can find the telephone in here."

"Hey," he cautioned, "I've got a method here," he looked around, gesturing to the mess, "believe it or not."

"I guess there's not much I can do to help then," she said, stirring her cup, "Since I don't know the _method_."

"Actually, I could use some help." He rose to plant a good morning kiss, "Too bad you have work," and he returned to his place among the clutter.

"Well, you're in luck."

"Huh?"

"Yep, thanks to my goof, Catherine knows you are here, and so she said I had too much overtime, that I better not dare come to work tonight."

He looked up at her with a huge grin. "Well then, I guess I'm grateful for your 'over talking'," under his breath he added, "for once."

"Hmmm, I guess I'll take that as a compliment," her face quizzical, "I think."

Grissom had the files he sought set aside, and he and Sara organized the rest of it and put it all away in the various boxes. He was so grateful to have her help and company making the potentially dreadful task quite pleasant. With Sara's help, things were moving along quite efficiently. Thus they decided to take a break and drive to an out of the way restaurant and inn to enjoy a romantic evening away. They surely deserved that. The time spent away together was pure heaven and provided both with a renewed sense of well being. Riding back to Vegas, Grissom admitted, "I must confess, I've never been so happy to be wrong about something."

"What's that?"

"I was wrong to think telling Catherine I was here was a bad idea."

Sara laughed, "Yes, indeed, this was time together we really needed to have."

"And, I guess, along those lines, I was wrong to show up unannounced, and not let you schedule more time off."

She slipped her hand to the back of his neck, her fingers massaging and playfully twirling the ends of his hair, "Glad you are coming around to that."

"I'll call Catherine when we get back, I'm up to it."

"Really?" Sara replied, "She understands, you know, you don't need to do that."

He nodded, "I know."

Catherine had finished another shift only to watch the team exit while she stayed behind to do the administrative work that never seemed to end. Grissom knew the schedule all too well, and knew this would be the time she would welcome any distraction.

"Willows," she answered her cell with frustration in her voice, not even checking the caller ID.

"Catherine, it's Gil."

"Oh my God!" she exclaimed as she dropped everything to concentrate on the voice in the receiver. "I can't believe this," she rubbed her forehead, trying to think of what to say. Naturally, true to form, Grissom was silent, waiting for her, "Um, I, ah, wanted to speak to you so badly, and now I have no idea what to say or what to ask you about."

He chuckled into the phone, "Well, I'll help you, here it is. I'm _OK,_ Catherine, I'm just trying to find my way out of the lab. It's a lot harder than I ever imagined."

She swallowed hard, "Sara was great the other night. She really helped me to understand things."

"Catherine, do you really?" he paused, "I mean, do you really understand why I can't visit you or the team? Why Sara couldn't at first?"

"I do, I get it." Thanks to Sara's disclosure, Catherine could see that the CSI burnout that Grissom and Sara battled was frighteningly powerful, bringing these two very strong individuals to unimaginable depths. She now understood Grissom's need to be distant. It all clicked.

"But, how?" he struggled with how to ask, "I _watched_ Sara go through it, and I didn't get it. How do _you_ get it?"

"I don't claim to say I understand they 'why's', but I do get the process of bur…ah," suddenly remembering Sara's caution to avoid the 'B.O.' word she redirected, "I mean, I get how hard it is for you both. When Sara shared that she was unable to contact Greg once she left, and seeing them together now, the strength of their friendship, I could tell that it was something very powerful that she was trying to beat back, making her incapable of coming anywhere near the lab or the people. I can see that you're going through much the same thing, and you need to keep your distance until the process is complete."

"You've always understood me better than I do myself."

Catherine laughed, "It's not that hard."

"Well, I'm glad you understand, and I owe you some thanks."

"For what?"

"For kicking Sara out of the lab last night."

"Oh," laughing, "Yes, it takes a good swift kick to do that. I take it you enjoyed yourselves."

"Very much, thank you." He sighed, "Catherine, I've got to go now, but I want you to take a vacation to Costa Rica once we get there. God knows, you're overdue for some _real_ time off."

"I don't know how I'm gonna do that, Gil," she responded, frustration in her tone, "We're short now, once we lose Sara, forget it!"

"That's the way I used to think, too." He lowered his tone, "Life's too short, Catherine, you need to do it."

She was silent, so he continued, "The cases will flow to the other shifts for a week, and you'll get your life back."

She nodded to herself, "Well, I know you are right, especially knowing where you're coming from now. I'll see what I can do."

"And, you should invite a certain detective to come along."

"You know about that!"

He laughed heartily, "Just be careful, I went down there to see Sara and when we left, we were married. The place has that kind of effect on you."

"Ok," she chuckled, "I'll be careful."

They said their good -byes, both very grateful to have shared the call.

As she pondered Grissom's conversation, and Sara's from the night before, Catherine made a promise to herself right there and then, in that very moment. She would be out the door with the first sign of a _chink in the armor_. She wouldn't risk being pulled under by it, because, at least at this point in time, she didn't see a life preserver in the form of a partner who had the same experience. Besides, she had a front row seat to the devastation that happens once the breach in your defense has occurred, and is left unchecked. Catherine had always marveled at those two social misfits finding each other, but now it seemed a karmic destiny that defied all odds. How many men would have let Sara go off without a fight, when even she didn't understand what she was doing, and all the while she still professed her love for him? And, what are the odds, that they would come together in just the right way to allow him a new life as well. Whew. _What are the odds?_

"One to infinity, gotta be…" Catherine said out loud to nobody in particular as she refocused her attention back to the schedule on her desk.

fin…

**A/N: Thank you to all for reading! We can only hope the PTB will throw us a bone next season and get back to Grissom and Sara's situation. In the meantime, we'll have to check out the fanfic's. lol.**


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